|Miriam, Virgin Mother triptych 2008
Artist: Bruce Herman
At 5:30 this morning I sat in our living room with the house completely quiet and the Christmas tree glowing… these are some of my favorite moments of the year when I can sit and read and reflect in that stillness. As I sat there I reflected on one of the best articles, With Child: Pregnancy and the Incarnation, that I’ve read in my alma matter’s magazine, STILLPOINT. The article was only a page long but it really made me think (link below).
I’ve realized that I’ve been discontent for nine months. I wish I could tell you that I handled pregnancy with grace and ease but I haven’t. I thought about everything I wished I could have been doing instead of what I was doing. Let me quote my favorite line from this article I read: “At many points in our lives we need to obey the admonition of Jesus- that the one who receives a child in His name receives the Lord himself… We’re not just in the abstract, being asked by God to receive a child, but in a fleshly, demanding way to receive a particular child. ‘Here, Jackie, meet Caedmon: he’s a very special boy, made in My image; shelter and feed him.’”
I wish I realized sooner that this was SUCH a neat thing to be going through pregnancy at the same time Mary did it with Jesus 2000 years ago… Despite the fact that I’ve had it rough with near constant sickness for 6 ½ months and some bad reports on Baby’s health I’m pretty sure that Mary had it just a smidge more rough than I did… after all, she was a virgin and not married (basically she could be killed for that back then). She had to get to the place she was giving birth on a donkey (I don’t even like donkeys. Long story but it all goes back to Pinocchio when I was little.). And she gave birth in a stable, Lord willing, I’ll be in Beverly Hospital where I have the option of an epidural (thank God). And you know what, if she had morning / all day sickness I’m pretty sure they didn’t have Zofran to help her keep food down.
I’m committing to really making this advent a season of preparation, both for the birth of Christ and the birth of Drew. In these 22ish days remaining I want to be constantly learning to receive Drew the way I would receive the Lord himself. This child is made in God’s image and it is such a profound GIFT to be entrusted with caring for this tiny little human being. My discontent came from feeling like I was no longer “me” because I couldn’t do certain things while pregnant. If I’m honest with myself about wanting this to be a season of preparation then I better realize how much more limited things will be after actually having Drew! Agnes Howard put it well… “we are being asked to receive a child in a fleshly, demanding way”… Give me the grace, Lord, to do that well.
Link to the article I mentioned above: http://www.gordon.edu/article.cfm?iArticleID=1034&iReferrerPageID=1676&iPrevCatID=134&bLive=1